Do you want to go shopping?
Do you want to go for coffee?
Do you want to come out for tea?
Would you like a drink?
All fairly mundane everyday questions. For most people. Not for me.
Yes I can shopping, if I'm home in an hour or two.
I don't think you want to come have "coffee" with me.
Sorry I can't come out for tea, they probably don't serve organic vegan, wheat free, sugar free, salt free, fat free, unprocessed ANYTHING!
And yes I'd bloody LOVE a drink!!!! But that too is just a dream for me.
My life is not normal.
My life is not normal, but it is my life and I'm happy for it to be not normal for as long as I get to live it. For as long as not normal keeps me feeling well.
Because I could drink coffee, eat meat and swill my booze, but chances are I'd die a lot faster.
So unfortunately you're all stuck with me!
And everyday that the passengers. that are my friends and family, sit on my not normal bus I silently thank them every night. For being on my ride. For accepting that this not normal is now my normal. And for not treating me like a sick person. Because I'm not. I'm still the same sometimes bitchy, somewhat misunderstood Margaret that I've always been.
Sometimes I wonder why some people from our pasts don't make it into our present. And why some people come into our lives when we've had to change our whole existence. I don't know why. But it's nice to feel like every person has a place in your journey. That they've helped you in some way. Whether it's because they inspired you to be like them, love them for being amazing or because there's something you don't like in them that makes you want to change yourself, every person we meet in this life contributes another line to the map of your life.
And my life is not normal, to some, but I love living it (most days) and if people don't want to help push when the ride breaks then they shouldn't be on in the first place. And if people don't want you for the shit bits than they don't deserve to be there for the love and laughter.
So to people who avoided our shit bits, We are fine without you.
Without you in my life I thought I'd never smile again, until I woke up smiling
