Back to reality we head. Scared. Unsure. Nervous. Skeptical. Excited. Worried. Anxious. Happy. Stressed.
So much to organise and to organise, in not only my head but my house!
Prepare for less money, less time, less interaction, less freedom. More commitment, determination, optimism, gratitude, support, juices, enemas.
How is my body going to react physically, how is my mind going to react......how is everyone else going to survive/understand the emotions? What if they think I'm a lunatic having a tantrum? will I have the support there? Should I concentrate on enhancing the calm, bottling it all in. Shut your mouth Margaret, swallow the problem and move on.
I'm only guessing how different life will be, so give me some time to adjust and I'll tell you how much easier/harder it has gotten.
More stress already added to the pot before the hard part has even begun! Swallow it down and move on Margaret.......
Keeping on track of the worst part of my day being fickle......my skin has gone absolutely crazy from treatment!!! And it's two weeks until my friends engagement party! I have a strapless dress to wear!!! With a cardigan now it would seem, as pointed out by my mother!! So life is pretty good, I'm annoyed with crappy skin! But me having crappy skin won't ruin her night or mean there's any less love in that room. Me having crappy skin won't make me have a bad night.
So I'm happy that my biggest issue today is something as petty as crappy skin, because even with my crappy skin my plane will land, my son will be happy to see his father, my over weight bag will be unpacked, my bed will be warm, my house safe, my too many possessions will be there waiting, my little life on my island will remain fairly simple. Safe. Not ripped apart by war or famine. Not shaken to the earth by earthquakes, not swallowed up by the ocean. So to crappy skin I say thank you for giving me the worst part of my day because the rest of it is pretty good from where I sit.
So I fly towards the next of my journey and I can't predict what it's going to bring but I hope i learn some grace, gratitude, compassion and composure! And I cross my fingers I'm not too hard to deal with, but I guess only time will tell.
1 comment:
I think you would be inhuman not to have the thoughts and worries you do.
I also think you already show a lot of grace, gratitude, compassion and composure. A lot more than myself and the majority of people I have met.
I am crossing everything that life does not get too much harder and that the people around you can tolerate the bad days as well as the good.
PS: I need some good juice combination idea's from you, maybe you could do a post on your faves....
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